2017 最后一章

今年总结词是 ：成长。

时间飞逝，记得才为2016年的成就感到自豪的夜晚转眼就隔了一年。这一年发生的事真的很多太多非常多。还没来得及结束一件事情，另一件就跟着跳了出来，真的很让我措手不及。当然还是有很多值得我去感恩的事情。
成长啊。今年成长飞速啊啊啊。不是我要学着去成长，而是被逼着长大。觉得自己老了好多年，内心年龄应该35岁了吧我的天啊哈哈哈哈。

帮助过我的人，谢谢你，或许只是一句小温侯但已足够暖心。
爱我信我的人，谢谢你，让我更加知道更加肯定自己的价值。
离开了我的人，谢谢你，我会懂得更爱自己祝你也快乐幸福。
我伤害过的人，对不起，或许失望难过但我绝对不是有心的。

致自己，
不管什么情况下，总要为自己着想。这社会太现实，你不为自己，谁为你? 别总爱浪费时间无所事事，别人在努力时，想想你在干什么。要超越别人，先学会改变自己。自己的事情自己决定，别人的话语永远只能是建议。

好，我回来了。朋友都问我最近在忙什么，怎么可以更新少得那么夸张。好像也是，以前每一个社交软体都会疯狂更新，就是几天没post 东西就觉得好像少了些什么。我真的不懂那是什么想法。反而现在却很处于一种“我没更新但我给你一个赞一个评论当作冒个泡我还活着”。

现在在准备着下礼拜三音乐学会的Audition吧，因为明年情人节前一星期会有个Aureum Musicae 演唱会，Performance team 里有16个唱歌的表演者，但这次这个event 只能容得下15个slot. *其实当下有点想要直接说 sorry i cant make it 然后就不用去什么audition了。

你知道.. 哈哈哈哈哈哈 上上个星期是club registration week. 啊我就不小心的有小小表演。*叹长气* 才和吉他手配过2次 我不是职业歌手啊亲爱的 。大学处女秀好像就毁掉喽 我以为过去就算了结果有video真的是每年都要回首一次啊干

最近有点处于什么都没自信的状态。我不知道这到底是什么引起的，但是就会觉得自己什么都比别人差，一直在怀疑自己的价值。

‘ 我会的，别人也会；我强项的，别人更强；别人会的，我都不会。’

就这个概念在脑袋里转啊转就会慢慢觉得自己所做的一切好像都很浪费。

哎哟最近身体超差的 以为自己可以抓回跑步的节奏结果差点换不了气。这个学期的时间表我不知道为什么我可以排得那么干，一直在饿肚子呵呵哈哈哈妈的。身边的朋友不知道干嘛突然很有兴趣要运动，整个超积极的，有什么run都知道哈哈哈然后就被叫去一起参加一个Night Run. 可是在12月23号，那个星期可以回家啊有放假啊啊。我应该牺牲回家的机会还是陪朋友去跑哈哈哈哈妈的做人真难。

现在就真的剩下2年我就毕业啦。讲真过去的一年我不知道自己做什么。除了在学业上有不错的成就，应该就没有了吧哈哈哈哈*好像没有什么值得骄傲的 

IT

It was an extra holiday for MMU-ian again, b'cause today is the convocation and almost all of the lecturer gonna attend to it. But idk why, my English lecturer posted in the group and mentioned that ALL CLASSES ON MONDAY CANCELLED. Damn so happy sial. Then end up still having 2 classes out of 4 classes today. woohoo but I'm lucky tho. The first and last class of the day were cancelled.  I can wake up late and back early. what a wonderful day.

But. too bad . having sore throat back again. I thought I'm already recover from it but with the 3 satay last night, nightmare back to me once again. I'm starving for delicious food so bad right now lol. I need spicy food, hot soup and crispy chicken. damn.

Btw, I watched IT last night .It is actually better than Annabelle does. But it is more likely teaching the public lesson but not scaring us lolol. This movie .... fck actually I'm quite afraid of clown, until I watch this movie in the front part, George was going out at late night and playing with Billy's paper boat. The boat fell into the drain and the fcking clown was down there. First it scared me, but then second thought was.. why the fck was the clown doing down there lol. Oh yeah. when George was trying to take the paper boat back, the fcking clown bit his arm. That was the moment I pretty sure I HATE CLOWNS *with sharp teeth.

Nahh. idk since when and why and how. I can overcome the fear after I watched horror movie. Before this, I can't really sleep well once I watched horror movie, and it can troubled me for a week. But now is like ... what's the story again? lol
And IT is trying to teach us to be brave and face what we always afraid of. Once you can overcome it, everything will be ok.

That's all. And I was wondering .. where the clown goes at last. meaning that, got part 2 is it . haha  

Tough week. Midterm week.

I've been going through a tough week. It feels so bad, can't even get enough sleep. :(

Nahh just kidding.
Just few days of the week. But the arrangement of the midterm is killing me so bad. I have 3 papers of midterm straight away in two days. Oops, it should be "within 24 hours". I spent the whole day of Friday // from 7.30 am till night 8 pm to study the Financial Management 2 which I need to recall back all the shits of Financial Management 1 in the previous semester which I already threw it somewhere else but not my brain. After the FM2 exam, I sat inside the hall as usual bcause the rest were like a flock of sheep rushing to the grassland for dinner. Then classmates came to my area and the thing I don't wish to happen started. THEY TALKED ABOUT THE FCKING PAPER. God damn, can you guys move abit and let me leave? I realized how bad I did in the paper after listened what they said. I can't take that actually. I just acted bodoh and smiled.

While for the next day, wake up at 7 am and head to school again. I felt my eyes were burning that time b'cause keep staring at the laptop. Yeah I didn't print out my note HAHA. Waste paper leh.
Then I spent half day study for Marketing paper which exam at 2.45 pm and losing sight on the next paper at 5 pm . Yeap I didn't touch my Financial Market AT ALL. The 1hr 15mins gaps wasn't enough for that. But I felt glad that I did the note before this. Thanks to myself. Just has a little times to have a glimpse on those notes. Entering the exam hall with blank mind. No kidding.
The questions were easy I swear. I answered all of it based on my common knowledge, but for the calculation part... hehe bye.

Even I know I fucked up my finance subjects, but I feel relieve after those papers. But seems like still more to go. Assignment for Marketing, English and Financial Management 2. Lucky that I've met my group members up for discussion and came out some ideas for the assignment. But then I just realize we still have 2 weeks to done before the due date. While for the English and FM2 , we not even start a shit yet lol. Bagus lah .

oh ya 13/9 I'm having another Mathematic test.

Gonna work hard for final. I don't want to fail any of it. I mean ..I wanna get a better result
.

时间怎么可以这么嚣张的快?!

我明明才刚为上个学期的大考失眠，现在又到了另个学期的大考。什么鬼。重点是，上课结束了? 什么时候的事? 怎么可以飘得那么轻盈。

又要开始那段每个早晨肚子绞痛、晚上很累、头脑很涨、带着超级无敌想睡觉的美好感觉躺在床上。结果一堆数目问题内容答案在脑里像跑马灯一样转啊转。然后就这样折磨几个小时到天亮去考试，这样折磨2星期。真心的累啊

这个学期是懒到一个点，颓废到不行，但我还是一样很靠北。因为上个学期的成绩出乎意料的不错*我他妈开心了整个星期*，所以这个学期就莫名冒上了一层压力。都是自己给予的。很多余 我也不想的。但当你看到你家人为了你成绩好而开心骄傲的样子 你还真的不忍心让成绩死得太难看。偏偏这个短学期自己就一直往家乡跑。几乎每个星期都有回去。还skip 了整个星期的课，我到底是在干什么，在家没碰过书，不对，应该说，想都没想过，似乎忘了自己还有在读书这回事。然后现在剩下不到10天的时间开始很紧张但身心就是不给力 完全没有想要拿起书本的动力。怎么会有那么懒得人我的天。

最近好像发生了好多好多事情，但一时也说不上来。答应自己的日记结果现在半年过去了。我想念那些有日记陪伴的生活。好像一个记忆卡，真的可以挖出你几乎忘掉的小细节，但想起之后却依然清晰可见。

不知道是不是年纪越来越大的时候*我知道我才21*但感觉月经期间，荷尔蒙失调得很严重，情绪颠倒得很夸张。小小的事可以难过的要命，也可以生气得飙汗，可以明明睡了好多个小时却还是好累。妈的无尾熊咩

哦对了我再次告别了长发。这次有点短，但我嫌它不够短。朋友都说我疯了，说我肥了，说我老了，说我矮了。你们是想怎样现在，说着说着很像妖怪叻干。总之是个不好打理的头发。不好打理的生活和人生lol

再多个星期就大考，之后的行程好像都满满的。希望一切不会落空就好，只是想要花多些时间在家人身上。

The Chinese New Year

Almost there almost there.
Chinese New Year is almost there but majority of MMU-ian went back to their home town since last week. I was wondering why they took holiday that early. I prefer the afterward.
Everyone is complaining about the 5-days-holiday are simply not enough for them and how it gonna make others face difficulty during the long journey way back to their home town. They even come out with a petition about it. Really? haha
I mean. Just skip the class as you guys always did. No matter how long the holiday is, we will still ask for more (for sure) But obviously we will make it longer by ourselves la arrhh pandai pandai lo haha.
Actually I planned to skip two weeks since my attendance is still perfect HAHAHA. But then one of the subjects made the presentation on 6th February and I force to be here again before that. LOLOLOL. It's okay. Final soon. Sem break soon.

YA LOL SEM BREAK SOON.
I mean I'm just here. I know nothing about my semester then I realize it is almost the end of it. Time flies bruh. Tolong lah lecturer, don't be too strict on our assignment. I already throw all I know to you already. Give some marks we deserve(except for those fcking free riders) God damn.
I was planning to go KL for celebrated my birthday with my sister but then the before-cny-sick spoiled it. Good la good la think positive can save money some more. But I'm getting better now. Will be back on night of 26th.
Oh right .. I can't attend to the reunion dinner with dearest XueJi. The timing is so wrong! Some of my friends are going to another place on the day I'm going back PRECISELY. Hope we can meet up very soon.

Happy Chinese New Year. I'm coming home <3

Examination vs Class Lesson

Well. I just finished both of my midterm test Macroeconomic and the Statistic. I was surprised that I manage to answer almost every question of Statistic but not Macro. Macro used to be my favourite subject since Form 6. Just I'm facing some language problems coz I used to studied in BM during STPM but it is English now. It is not easy to translate that. and..

WHO THE HECK SAID FORM SIX IS MUCH MORE HARDER THAN DEGREE DO. HAR COME HERE I WANT TO SEE YOU.

The questions were so KBAT. And I cant even think proper in the limited time. Too many question and too many marks in it. So stress that I need to spend time to analyse the question and the time was bothering me so much lol.  The questions in the test is so much different with the exercise we did in tutorial and so not related with what we learnt in class . lol. ok I shouldn't expect that much tho.

Okay then. hmm
Two more to go on next week. Good Luck.

Keep it up in 2017

When others are nagging about how their year has wasted and ruined, I know I'm the lucky one.
2016 was a fulfilling year of mine. I hit my target. I gained what I want, got what I wished for..
I feel so glad that I've grow up. Wouldn't be that childish anymore. I was an extremely negative person in the past few years. What I learnt from those years was - Nothing help but only make things worse.
Never afraid of trying.
You only live once. Live fully die happy.

Do something that your future self will thank you for.

KEEP IT UP in 2017. Hold what you believe and the value in you.
I think I'm doing great in last year and gonna bring all the positive thoughts to a new year and make me become even better.
Don't change because a new year is coming up but change for your own personal growth no matter what resolutions you make, they start with you.